My last day as a stay at home mom

I knew it would have to come to an end. We are struggling to pay our bills. But I didn't think that I would get a call today and have to start tomorrow. I had a breakdown and literally had trouble breathing.

So tomorrow I start working as an aid in a special needs preschool. This should be interesting. The pay is crap so lets hope it's worth it.

I called dad this morning after I got the offer to ask him about watching bubby. He said he would do it for a bit, but that I needed to make other arrangements because he has things he needs to do. Then he said he wouldn't watch him this next Tuesday because he was going to go to the fair "come hell or high water". WTF. I was so upset.

My sister realized how upset I was and called my mom. She promptly called me and I told her what was going on and how I really didn't have a choice but to take the job. She went home on her lunch to lay into my dad and he completely changed his story. Sure he'd watch Daven. He just can't do it some times when he has a dr.'s appointment. I told mom no, this was not what he said to me.

So I don't know what's going to happen. If I can just make it through tomorrow that will be a huge step.

I finally got up the nerve to call my OB this morning about my ppd. Apparently they will only monitor that through 3 months pp and I have to go see someone else about it now. Stupid.

Have I mentioned yet that bubby sleeps on his side now? It's so stinking cute!

Well it's getting late so I'm going to drown my worries in a chocolate chocolate chip muffin and snuggle in bed with my little guy. Pray for me - I'm going to need it!